Meaning behind the name

It seems fitting that I explain why I chose to name the blog "The joy of open palms" on the eve of Easter. This Easter, I will attend church with my fiancé and his precious family, have a wonderful Indian lunch and then rest and relax. Last Easter, I was in Alabama still trying to process and digest the reality that my Mom had just been diagnosed with cancer and was given a short time to live. *Breathe in, breathe out* While I was walking a painful, raw journey with my Mom, I re-read Ann Voskamp's book "One Thousand Gifts." If you have not read this book, I urge you to read it. Here is a quote from the book that really challenged me:

“Humbly let go. Let go of trying to do, let go of trying to control, let go of my own way, let go of my own fears. Let God blow His wind, His trials, oxygen for joy's fire. Leave the hand open and be. Be at peace. Bend the knee and be small and let God give what God chooses to give because He only gives love and whisper a surprised thanks. This is the fuel for joy's flame. Fullness of joy is discovered only in the emptying of will. And I can empty. I can empty because counting His graces has awakened me to how He cherishes me, holds me, passionately values me. I can empty because I am full of His love. I can trust.”

So that became my motto in Alabama. I wanted desperately to have open palms, to accept with thankfulness, whatever the Lord chose to give OR take away. There is great joy in having this kind of trust in the Lord. Let me tell you right now that this is not always me. I sometimes fight to have joy and to trust. I am still journeying. I am still learning to live with my palms open. This blog will undoubtedly be a lot about my journey with my Mom and really, my journey of joy.

As Easter Sunday nears, I want to leave you with the beauty of grace and why the death and resurrection of Christ is all the more sweeter. My Mom never feared death. She knew after March 18th, 2013 that her days were numbered and yet, she chose to live. She had a quiet hope that shook my faith and humbled me. My Mom knew Christ as her Savior. She believed in the One who gave His life for her own. She knew her Redeemer conquered death and the grave. And that He LIVES. Two days before my Mom passed away, I began praying for the Lord to come get her. She was in somewhat of a coma stage and could not move, eat, drink, talk, etc. Remembering those days is quite painful but God answered my prayers. On May 31st, 2013, Jesus came for her and when she took her last breath, I walked outside and wept tears of thankfulness that He finally came for her. *deep breath* So this Easter, I would love to share with you the hope that my Mom had, the hope I have. I would be honored to share Jesus with you. And it is not because it is Easter. Let's be real. Every day we (should) celebrate the risen Savior and make much of Him. But why not Easter Sunday? May tomorrow be filled with His Presence as we seek to give Him glory in all things because He is always good. Always.

  For I know that my Redeemer lives. -Job 19:25